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No Choice

When my middle son was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), we learned many new terms. One of them was No Choice.

Bedtime. No Choice.

Bathroom. No Choice.

Get Up. No Choice.

But, like all of us, he believed he had a choice. He still does.

Yet, No Choice is more about understanding some things are simply understood.

Think of it as the bracketed “understood You” of a command. We can choose to ignore it, but that doesn’t mean we cease to be the understood subject preceding the requested action.

None of us much likes to be commanded to do something, especially something as mundane as going to bed or going to the bathroom or getting up in the morning. Add “Obey” to the list, and we can expect a demand for choice.

Perhaps that is why the Bible’s commands can be adversarial to us. The No Choice seems counter to the freedom we are promised with redemption. The No Choice is constricting when it is something we do not want to do. The No Choice seems as if we have no control.

Like my son, we believe we have a choice. We still do.

Yet, understanding that some things are simply understood is one of the greatest lessons we can learn.

When I learned about my son’s diagnosis, I realized I had No Choice. I had to learn a few new terms and figure out how to deal with them. But, the biggest one was No Choice.


I had No Choice about loving my son.

Please understand. I don’t love my son’s diagnosis. I love my son.

Some things are simply understood.

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