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My Preferred Playlist

“Could you change that, please?” I asked my husband, waggling my fingers towards the talk-radio voices that were disturbing my ability to read before bed.

“Hmm,” he said. By his smirk, I knew I was in trouble.

I endured listening to a few goofy choices before I bantered, “Maybe I should pick some awful song you hate to annoy you while you’re reading.”

I could think of a genre of music I listened to when we were teenagers that might have annoyed him. The problem is that I’m disenchanted with the genre myself. I decided I would be annoying myself if I did that.

I chose instead a music group we both enjoy. In fact, he was the one who introduced me to their music style. Musical cadences filled the room into the wee hours of the morning until a drum solo got to be a little too jazzy for sleeping.

Then there was only the sound of our own silence. I went back to sleep and soundly.

But, before I did, it occurred to me that silence is on my favorite playlist. Although I may turn on an audiobook, I rarely listen to music when I’m in the car by myself. I especially don’t turn on the car stereo when one of my kids is in the car. If they want to talk, then we can talk. If they don’t, that’s okay, too. If I want to listen to my audiobook, they listen to music through their ear buds. Sometimes I let them listen to music of their choosing if it is music I can tolerate.

When my husband is driving, there is always music playing. Some of it I have grown accustomed to hearing. Other selections I find dissonant for one reason or another. Besides Bill Evans Trio, I’ve learned to appreciate Brian Eno, Steve Hackett, and California Guitar Trio. Except for maybe Brian Eno (which I will explain in my Friday post), I don’t listen to these groups unless I am with my husband. These are our playlists. Although I think I’ve memorized most songs by Alison Krauss.

I keep thinking I will reinstate a playlist (again more to be explained on Friday), but then I wonder why. Do I need to have that constant thrum of noise in the background? Decidedly not.

Music is a part of who I am and how I serve at my church. But, there are moments when I need silence to remind me that mine is not the voice in the room. Sometimes I need to think without distraction or I need to give my attention to the person sitting next to me. Sometimes I need to consider what God wants me to know about Him or a situation I am facing.

Honestly, I know that’s how this change in my playlist started. I can think of a specific time when I simply needed to “be still and know.” I guess it’s become more of a habit than not to keep my stereo off and tune in my ears to Him.

“Be still, and know that I am God.
    I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth!”

Psalm 46:10 ESV

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